I have an arranged marriage. So has my wife — or is that obvious! Both of us were into ’serious’ relationships with other people in the past that at some point in time both of us believed will transform into marriage. Neither did. Those relationships could only transform into chaos, ruckus, the works…
We have common friends who have, oops had, been seeing each other for six years till last weekend. They had those typical ‘been long into this relationship’ traits, and some ‘filmy’ ones too:
- Claims of unflinching love for each other
- Yet, constant fights
- Cognizance that their relationship will not work out
- Yet, those “we’re going strong” idioms
- Caste, actually religion, divide — with both families strictly opposed; financial incompatibilities not withstanding
- Yet, the hope that they will make it work out
- And yet, all efforts to procrastinate any thoughts about the ‘M’ word
If you really ask me, it had to end. And I told it to both of them individually in so many words. Maybe I shouldn’t have.
The girl got engaged last weekend to “that perfect guy”. And it was arranged.
6 years wasted — if only one of them had the courage to end it immediately after the “its not going to work out” feeling set in. Or. If both of them had the patience.
I’ve been seeing so many failed relationships in the past that it’s not funny — actually even marriages; but somehow my count of ‘love’ marriages/relationships failing is much higher. Have we all forgotten love? Or?
on Jul 12th, 2006 at 5:12 pm
Sometimes relationships don’t work for a simple reason that we take each other for granted - getting ourselves completely into the cobwebs of this mundane world, forgetting the basic need - love. Expression may not be a criteria, but you need to find time for the ones you love or they may not find time for you.
Too bad your friend got engaged to someone else. Wasn’t just time, along with were those emotions, the love, the promises, the innocence and so much more…Life - was never arranged for anybody - its us who arrange it. Wish we could do the same with love…
on Jul 13th, 2006 at 12:52 pm
So, there’s an anonymous comment on your blog and I am wondering if you’re wondering if I’ve written this one too. You have in the past tracked some anonymous comments back to me and accurately! Tell me honestly: did you think I wrote it? Of course, that question becomes invalid if you knew who was writing it.
on Jul 14th, 2006 at 11:55 am
It has to be you; Who else could have an expression that picturesque!